~ Night of the Big Chicken ~
Switchblade
A deep voice in the dark ~ "What did they do ?" The hooded figure looks around, then leans into leans back into the child's whisper, "These ... 'humans' ... and then tell me who." The sound of ratcheting steel, metal grinding on concrete, nearby traffic outside the alley shows around the 2010's.
The child's whisper into his ear ... eyes begin to glow a rage in flesh stripped sockets, rusted bone worn through at the cheeks.
The man - "ooh ... and then noo ... " A last rattle of iron closure as the child watches him rise ...
('Fire and Brimstone' by Death Valley Girls)
~ Switchblade ~
Directed by
some human
Starring
literal droves of them
Written by
Alan Smithee
it's like an infestation ...
A Big Chicken Production
fuck 'em
~ A cargo ship plows for the harbor, knocking the fishing boats and tugs aside.
Voice on the telephone ~ Nervously voiced over the scene, "You don't understand, nobody can know where I'm going."
Woman on the other end ~ "I'm sorry, but we have to register your papers though the consulate."
~ The ship ignores all calls to stop as it approaches the docks at speed.
Voice ~ "No you don't."
Voice on the telephone ~ Nervously voiced over the scene, "You don't understand, nobody can know where I'm going."
Woman on the other end ~ "I'm sorry, but we have to register your papers though the consulate."
~ The ship ignores all calls to stop as it approaches the docks at speed.
Voice ~ "No you don't."
~ The sirens sound ...
Other ~ A sigh ... "It will cost."
Voice ~ "I wouldn't trust it any other way."
~ It crashes the docks.
Other ~ A sigh ... "It will cost."
Voice ~ "I wouldn't trust it any other way."
~ It crashes the docks.
('Antagonist' by Nova Twins)
Guy with that voice on the phone and some local friends curious in the nightclub ~
Dead man drinking - "I don't know. I don't know" Drinks then waves for another. "Goddamn it what is that Noise !?"
The cloaked man walks through the nightclub, security and police swarming too halt, any gunfire not deflected by his heavy bladed arms seems pointless anyway as his progress is continuous and in a very straight line, death meeting any who seek to damage him, the rest tossed aside.
DMD - "I don't know if they're connected I mean ... " The drink comes, "Thank you now fuck off." Slams it and calls after "Hey ! Get me another."
The man tears the head from an attacker and beats down the next with it until both are crushed.
DMD - "I don't know if they're connected. ... "Do you hear that Sound !?"
The unknown man walks enters the nightclub, the bouncer cut through, the security responding. The crowd parts while those without notice he walks through, the sweep of a heavy metal arm tosses a crowd inoffensively.
He's shot in the back by a security man covered in blood ~
Switchblade - Turns showing his flesh stretched over a rusted out skull, "Oh no ... oh no ... you've shot me full of holes." The blades ratchet out from his arms as he turns, "But I've got no blood left to give so get ye no bowls." Leaps forth.
~ Man at the table ~
DMD - "All they know is they were all by a ... rusty machete. ... maybe an axe. Where's that fucking bitch with my drink !?"
Switchblade - Looming over the dead man drinking, "None left to give, but choke on your own, you will, for as long as you live."
The sound of rusted blade scraping rusted metal to black, music out. The promised gurgling sound, then screams and more gun shots.
Dead man drinking - "I don't know. I don't know" Drinks then waves for another. "Goddamn it what is that Noise !?"
The cloaked man walks through the nightclub, security and police swarming too halt, any gunfire not deflected by his heavy bladed arms seems pointless anyway as his progress is continuous and in a very straight line, death meeting any who seek to damage him, the rest tossed aside.
DMD - "I don't know if they're connected I mean ... " The drink comes, "Thank you now fuck off." Slams it and calls after "Hey ! Get me another."
The man tears the head from an attacker and beats down the next with it until both are crushed.
DMD - "I don't know if they're connected. ... "Do you hear that Sound !?"
The unknown man walks enters the nightclub, the bouncer cut through, the security responding. The crowd parts while those without notice he walks through, the sweep of a heavy metal arm tosses a crowd inoffensively.
He's shot in the back by a security man covered in blood ~
Switchblade - Turns showing his flesh stretched over a rusted out skull, "Oh no ... oh no ... you've shot me full of holes." The blades ratchet out from his arms as he turns, "But I've got no blood left to give so get ye no bowls." Leaps forth.
~ Man at the table ~
DMD - "All they know is they were all by a ... rusty machete. ... maybe an axe. Where's that fucking bitch with my drink !?"
Switchblade - Looming over the dead man drinking, "None left to give, but choke on your own, you will, for as long as you live."
The sound of rusted blade scraping rusted metal to black, music out. The promised gurgling sound, then screams and more gun shots.
~ At the cafe, talking over the loud music, always the same one, Gabrielle waiting tables in the background,
Raphael working in the kitchen behind the order up slot in the wall.
Miserella (because that's literally the first name I could think of that isn't of someone I know) - "Yah nobody knows where he went. He just started acting weird and then he was gone. Cleaned out all the accounts and just ... gone."
Bets (short for Betsy ... ?) - "So there goes tuition ... "
Miserella - "Yeah. All gone. I can't even pay property taxes, that place is huge."
Bets (short for Betsy ... ?) - "So there goes tuition ... "
Miserella - "Yeah. All gone. I can't even pay property taxes, that place is huge."
Bets - (because people used to literally name their children that) "Can you at least sell off the art collection ?"
Miserella - "I've got some leech coming to look at it ... I don't know."
The scene from the club, her dad, "I don't know."
Miserella - "I don't know."
Bets - "So what like ... a Job !?"
Miserella looks at her like she may kill.
~ The waitress spits in the drink, eyes go wide at the scene, drops it and screams.
~ Detective - Voiced over the scream on a phone in the streets, "We have a what ?"
~ In the chief's office.
Chief - "We have a monster ... " Leans back in his chair grinning ... a glance to the drawer ...
Miserella - "I've got some leech coming to look at it ... I don't know."
The scene from the club, her dad, "I don't know."
Miserella - "I don't know."
Bets - "So what like ... a Job !?"
Miserella looks at her like she may kill.
~ The waitress spits in the drink, eyes go wide at the scene, drops it and screams.
~ Detective - Voiced over the scream on a phone in the streets, "We have a what ?"
~ In the chief's office.
Chief - "We have a monster ... " Leans back in his chair grinning ... a glance to the drawer ...
Detective - A sigh with a patient smile, "Please do." Motions his silence as he gets up to close the office door. All eyes look with concern as the window slats close to block their view. He turns back to see the chief already chugging the bottle straight.
Caps it and chucks it back to the drawer.
Detective - ... "Do you mind ?"
Chief - "I do. A monster." The ratcheting sound. "And it won't fucking die."
Detective - Sloughs back to the chair ... "So why me ?"
Chief - "Because you've got the same issue."
~ The bullets fly as he nearly appears to walk between them shooting back, one shot and a forehead each. Pockets the pistol and lights a smoke as another bullet tears the sleeve of his very nice jacket. He looks angrily to the source still pointing scared, his pistol clicks a misfire.
~ Then oncoming fist.
Detective - "Yeah I may have that issue too."
Chief - "And why is that ? Do you think."
Detective - Suddenly serious in the eyes, "Because fate is a merciless whore." A flash of a grin and a drink from the bottle before passing it back.
Chief - "With a heart as cruel as the sea ... "
~ Miserella - Wearing a hotdog on a stick uniform at the mall with a big dumb hat demonstrating the name, "Fuck this."
Chief - Bottle toast, "Amen to that." Drinks, caps and drops into the drawer.
Detective - Pulling his pack of smokes, "Do you mind ?"
Chief - "Disgusting habit." Slams the drawer (the doubling's intentional).
Caps it and chucks it back to the drawer.
Detective - ... "Do you mind ?"
Chief - "I do. A monster." The ratcheting sound. "And it won't fucking die."
Detective - Sloughs back to the chair ... "So why me ?"
Chief - "Because you've got the same issue."
~ The bullets fly as he nearly appears to walk between them shooting back, one shot and a forehead each. Pockets the pistol and lights a smoke as another bullet tears the sleeve of his very nice jacket. He looks angrily to the source still pointing scared, his pistol clicks a misfire.
~ Then oncoming fist.
Detective - "Yeah I may have that issue too."
Chief - "And why is that ? Do you think."
Detective - Suddenly serious in the eyes, "Because fate is a merciless whore." A flash of a grin and a drink from the bottle before passing it back.
Chief - "With a heart as cruel as the sea ... "
~ Miserella - Wearing a hotdog on a stick uniform at the mall with a big dumb hat demonstrating the name, "Fuck this."
Chief - Bottle toast, "Amen to that." Drinks, caps and drops into the drawer.
Detective - Pulling his pack of smokes, "Do you mind ?"
Chief - "Disgusting habit." Slams the drawer (the doubling's intentional).
('Cecilia' by Simon and Garfunkel)
Two
black dogs run barking to the shredded outer fence of a property
expanse, inside a frightened man packs quickly, stuffing cash to a bag
and turning for the door. Outside the security team closes in after the
dogs.
~ While Miserella roller-skates around her massive empty
house in her drive in theater uniform (movie screen on her head showing
security footage of the scene).
The hounds stop barking at the
cloaked man as his his legs split on two as now a tall beast looking
down at these two. He leaps over and bounds with blades ratcheting out,
naked beneath the cloak but for the many straps required to hold
together his appendages over flesh which seems similarly there to hold
together what's rusted bone and blade.
~ then out the backdoor and into the pool.
He charges the attackers with a swipe to the bullets as though annoyances, side to side leaps now harder to track, and then into the fray.
Switchblade - "Overrated to be sated when the flesh is liberated to be dated to be freighted like you're supermarket baited now you're crated consecrated to be the future's waited there'll be flowers there'll be powers and lots of fallen towers as I scour and devour for every hour after hour ..." To the last dropping his gun in terror before falling to his knees. "So now you cower."
He smiles as the dogs run up, tearing
the security man apart. Looks to the sound of the starting engine then
leaps away while the dogs take their screaming meal, the sound of
crunching metal in the distance.
____
Detective - "And my fee ?"
Chief - "You're a 'Headhunter'. Your fee's for a head. Bring me a head and I'll pay you your fee. So get the fuck out of here and start earning it, and by the way. Interpol's waiting for you at your shitty little apartment."
Detective - "Fuck me."
Chief - "I'd rather fuck a lawnmower."
~ two
('Down by the Water' by PJ Harvey)
Miserella watches the huge fight breaking out directly in front of her Shake Shack counter annoyed, an equally stupid uniform with a hat like a shake with a straw sticking out of what would be her brain ...
While in an unknown motel the detective watches a woman ride.
~ Switchblade jacks his arm, dropping a cable, He pulls an old school portable television from his cloak, extra wiring hanging from. He sets it on a stone.
It's actually a pretty good fight.
In the motel ...
~ He scurries up the telephone pole.
She laughs sipping before the owner points to the stupid shack door to leave.
~ Jacks it in and drops down near, as the screen statics on to the next scene.
____
Security footage ~
Switchblade - Pulling his blades from the broken hood of the broken car, "Evil dragon you hide my prey but have him still, I will, you are not my first slay. Inside I see the man you venerate, and so your foul scales I must penetrate."
While in an unknown motel the detective watches a woman ride.
~ Switchblade jacks his arm, dropping a cable, He pulls an old school portable television from his cloak, extra wiring hanging from. He sets it on a stone.
It's actually a pretty good fight.
In the motel ...
~ He scurries up the telephone pole.
She laughs sipping before the owner points to the stupid shack door to leave.
~ Jacks it in and drops down near, as the screen statics on to the next scene.
____
Security footage ~
Switchblade - Pulling his blades from the broken hood of the broken car, "Evil dragon you hide my prey but have him still, I will, you are not my first slay. Inside I see the man you venerate, and so your foul scales I must penetrate."
Tears the door off, then two fast stabs before walking away. The two dogs are briefly seen as they circle at the bottom corner of the screen to follow dopishly.
...
Chief - "Interpol's still waiting at your shitty little apartment."
...
Detective - "I know."
...
Chief - "heh"
________________
Miserella - Flipping burgers on the barbecue while wearing a Red Rocket (see GI Joe) on her head, "What I already paid the year's property taxes so all I need is food."
Bets - "Um."
Miserella - "What !? I Got this."
Bets - "Fine. But you only eat hamburgers now."
Miserella - "Do You know where the kitchen is in this place !? I skated all the fuck around it ... I have no fucking clue."
Bets - "I see."
Bets - "Fine. But you only eat hamburgers now."
Miserella - "Do You know where the kitchen is in this place !? I skated all the fuck around it ... I have no fucking clue."
Bets - "I see."
...
Miserella - "I sleep in the living room now. I set up little kitchen in the closet."
Miserella - "I sleep in the living room now. I set up little kitchen in the closet."
...
Miserella - "And fine I'm Selling the art the creepy guy's coming tomorrow. You know the art world is strangely underground I had to meet him in a warehouse in the middle of the night at a warehouse with a Picasso wrapped in brown paper."
Bets - "And he was legit ?"
Miserella - "He was cash. But he had it ! So ... " Pulls out a calculator (?), "If I eat $3000 dollars a month ... that's ... huh."
Bets - "What about fuck around funds."
Miserella - "I have no idea how to unload doubloons."
Bets - "Did you just say 'doubloons' !? Why not just get a smaller house !?"
Bets - "What about fuck around funds."
Miserella - "I have no idea how to unload doubloons."
Bets - "Did you just say 'doubloons' !? Why not just get a smaller house !?"
Miserella - "Because I want to be able to start a school for gifted youngsters."
...
Bets - "Is that a joke ?"
Miserella - "Yeah but the thing is I know if I sell it, I'll won't actually be able to again."
Miserella - "Yeah but the thing is I know if I sell it, I'll won't actually be able to again."
...
Bets - "Huh."
...
...
Bets - "What about like a party motel ?"
Miserella - "That's actually a way better idea."
________________
Meanwhile at his shitty little apartment three men wait ...
Obvious lead - Reaching into his pocket, "Fuck this guy, I need a cup of coffee." The two men smash the door open, he looks up from his lock-pick set ... "Jesus Christ. You. Make the fucking coffee."
First - "I'm sorry." Sulks into the apartment.
Lead - "And you go wait outside, you get no fucking coffee at all."
Second - "aw." Sulks away.
________________
Miserella - "That's actually a way better idea."
________________
Meanwhile at his shitty little apartment three men wait ...
Obvious lead - Reaching into his pocket, "Fuck this guy, I need a cup of coffee." The two men smash the door open, he looks up from his lock-pick set ... "Jesus Christ. You. Make the fucking coffee."
First - "I'm sorry." Sulks into the apartment.
Lead - "And you go wait outside, you get no fucking coffee at all."
Second - "aw." Sulks away.
________________
In the morning ...
The detective walks through the smashed door. "Jesus Christ." To the lead on the couch, "You know I'd have expected you guys to use a lock-pick.
Lead - Puts down the coffee (the detective's stupid mug, he eyes it), "Local hires."
Detective - "Why would Interpol need local door crashers ?"
Lead - "Because, like the video you saw with your chief, the entire story, it's all a fake."
The detective walks through the smashed door. "Jesus Christ." To the lead on the couch, "You know I'd have expected you guys to use a lock-pick.
Lead - Puts down the coffee (the detective's stupid mug, he eyes it), "Local hires."
Detective - "Why would Interpol need local door crashers ?"
Lead - "Because, like the video you saw with your chief, the entire story, it's all a fake."
Detective - "No it's not."
____
Creepy art dealer - "Yesss My dear Miserella, yes it is." Sets the painting down and moves on to the next.
____
Lead - "No. I's not."
____
Creeper - "Yes ... it is."
Bets - Leans into Miserella's ear and whispers, "He'll try to buy it later for way cheaper, saying it's still a high quality reproduction."
Miserella - (wearing a 20 foot gown) "I knew I hated this guy." Walks to the painting and puts her foot through it, looks to the dealer's stunned eyes, "Next time you want to talk that shit to me we all watch another masterpiece die, I've got plenty to spare. Next one."
Dealer - "Needs restoration."
Miserella - Examines it closer, "How much ?" Pulls a switchblade and switches it.
Bets - "Where the fuck did you even get that."
Dealer - Clears his throat, "One hundred thousand."
Miserella - "On ?"
Dealer - "One million plus at auction. I get twenty percent."
Miserella - "Sold !"
____
Creepy art dealer - "Yesss My dear Miserella, yes it is." Sets the painting down and moves on to the next.
____
Lead - "No. I's not."
____
Creeper - "Yes ... it is."
Bets - Leans into Miserella's ear and whispers, "He'll try to buy it later for way cheaper, saying it's still a high quality reproduction."
Miserella - (wearing a 20 foot gown) "I knew I hated this guy." Walks to the painting and puts her foot through it, looks to the dealer's stunned eyes, "Next time you want to talk that shit to me we all watch another masterpiece die, I've got plenty to spare. Next one."
Dealer - "Needs restoration."
Miserella - Examines it closer, "How much ?" Pulls a switchblade and switches it.
Bets - "Where the fuck did you even get that."
Dealer - Clears his throat, "One hundred thousand."
Miserella - "On ?"
Dealer - "One million plus at auction. I get twenty percent."
Miserella - "Sold !"
~ three
Detective - "He's a man. Disfigured. Probably in pain. Lost."
Lead - A laugh to himself leaning back, he takes the cup and drinks, detective eying the cup. "Sure. Two outta three, but he's not lost. There is a pattern. These men do have commonality."
Detective - "Then why haven't you intercepted him ?"
Lead - "Because it's a very common, commonality. They're all perverts. Pedophiles. And we only know about it looking postmortem. When it all come out. Now. What we've seen is, that the victims all knew he was coming for them, so they know that commonality. One event."
Detective - "Like one particular girl. Girl ?"
Lead - "Yes, it seems most likely to have been a female child."
Detective - "Have been ? Was there a body ?"
Lead - "No. Or maybe. Frankly there's been a lot of bodies, it's hard to say. But I mean these murders started ten years ago. She'd probably be an adult by now."
Lead - A laugh to himself leaning back, he takes the cup and drinks, detective eying the cup. "Sure. Two outta three, but he's not lost. There is a pattern. These men do have commonality."
Detective - "Then why haven't you intercepted him ?"
Lead - "Because it's a very common, commonality. They're all perverts. Pedophiles. And we only know about it looking postmortem. When it all come out. Now. What we've seen is, that the victims all knew he was coming for them, so they know that commonality. One event."
Detective - "Like one particular girl. Girl ?"
Lead - "Yes, it seems most likely to have been a female child."
Detective - "Have been ? Was there a body ?"
Lead - "No. Or maybe. Frankly there's been a lot of bodies, it's hard to say. But I mean these murders started ten years ago. She'd probably be an adult by now."
Detective - "Yeah ... it does seem unlikely he could cross a street without reason some specific reason to, let alone track these people all over the world. So why are we talking then, why do you think there's more targets here ?"
Lead - "Because there's been no ship of the damned crashing in to any other harbors yet."
Detective - "You think that was him ?"
Lead - "I know it was him. And I know it wasn't complicated. He could be working alone. She may not even have a clue."
____
Bets - "That's a lot of dog chow."
Miserella - "I don't even know where those dogs fucking came from."
____
The woman's voice on the phone - "Of course. But it will cost."
Desperate sounding man - "Of course it will cost. About as much as you do. Arrange it."
Pilot comm chatter as a large private plane descends for landing ~
Lead - "Because there's been no ship of the damned crashing in to any other harbors yet."
Detective - "You think that was him ?"
Lead - "I know it was him. And I know it wasn't complicated. He could be working alone. She may not even have a clue."
____
Bets - "That's a lot of dog chow."
Miserella - "I don't even know where those dogs fucking came from."
____
The woman's voice on the phone - "Of course. But it will cost."
Desperate sounding man - "Of course it will cost. About as much as you do. Arrange it."
Pilot comm chatter as a large private plane descends for landing ~
('God's Gonna Cut You Down' by Johnny Cash)
The rear cargo door kicks open, the compartment flooding with dogs, the cloaked man extending bladed arms and cutting away. Gunfire flashing through the windows as seen from outside the plane at night from the responding security as he works his way, dogs leaping for throats amid the decompression paperwork. A head flies by the ports, followed by a dog trying to catch it.
Makes the cockpit, the terrified pilot and co with the attendants alone remaining.
Switchblade - To the nearest attendant, "Descend we do leave your corpses to fate, if you've got left a reason to slate then fate will create for you, a way to see this through, if only that evil you lack."
Looks out the cockpit glass as the ground approaches.
...
Switchblade - "Or you might try the crates we hid in, in the back." Smiles as the runway lights approach.
('Lost at Birth' by Public Enemy)
He stabs the controls through with one arm after the other into the pilot's and co's stations.
The eyes go wide as they all turn to for the back, tripping over dogs and body pieces, a stewardess is overcome by the moment and carnage, falls apart and just screams ...
Air crews in the padded steel crates, the lids slam shut. The rescue trucks depart their garages, ground crews to station.
~ Wings crumple, now just a complete fireball.
(2:30) It scrapes ground with no gear down, skidding with a bounce and a spin, wreckage in the air as a sealed cargo container filled with screaming attendants flies spinning by the camera's view.
____
Miserella - "There goes the Renoir ... "
Bets - Watches with concern as a couple of rottweilers run by ... "A Renoir would feed this many dogs for like a month."
Miserella - "Fuck !"
____________
Detective - Straightening his tie in the shitty motel mirror, "Now do you believe in monsters ?"
Woman (from before) - Walks up behind and fixing his collar, she whispers in his ear with the voice on the phone from the beginning. "I don't believe in shit." And suddenly he's behind her, she looks back, "Neither God nor the devil." He puts the flip razor to her throat, a tear from her eye. "But yes I do believe in monsters."
Detective - Whispers in her ear with a hand sliding around her throat, "One more call."
Woman - Terrified, "And then we're done ?"
Detective - Cuts a strap from her slip and smiles, "And then we're done."
~ Miserella washes examines her face in the bathroom mirror at the coffee shop, looks down to wash her hands and looks up as the detective slashes her throat from behind. Then gone with no wound left but a definitive red stripe set into flesh.
('The Wind' by PJ Harvey)
The detective walks new streets smoking, watches an airplane descend for landing overhead ...
Smoking in the crowd, past homeless camps and burning protests, police beatings and murder, sunglasses on. A police shootout at the bank as the detective walks between the bullets, passing just before the panic explosion.
Detective - "God I love this town." Looks at his watch. "Like a drill-bit through the skull."
~ He screams with the dated drill's motor, trying to break the gurney straps as it enters through just behind the ear, eyes straining to see.
Looks at his watch again, a smile as his phone rings ...
Chief - On the cell, "We've got a talker."
Detective - Looking around with a smile, "Already there."
~ He screams with the dated drill's motor, trying to break the gurney straps as it enters through just behind the ear, eyes straining to see.
Looks at his watch again, a smile as his phone rings ...
Chief - On the cell, "We've got a talker."
Detective - Looking around with a smile, "Already there."
('N.O.V.A.' by Nova Twins)
Back at the cafe ~
Miserella - "I fucking hated my father. And I never even knew why. Like one day I woke up, saw him at the breakfast table and it was like I really saw him for who he was and ... he looked so fucking Weak sitting there. And I just fucking hated him for it. I don't know."
Sips ... "Then last night it finally hit me. He's dead ! And I cried for hours so and I hate him for that too. So then I cried some more. Like rage crying"
Bets - "Hence coffee."
Miserella - "Yeah. Hence coffee."
Bets - "You know I hated your father too. There was just something creepy about him, the way he looked at me ... I'm just going to say I'm not surprised your mom left."
Miserella - "I'm not surprised what happened just after."
Bets - "Yeah ... "
Miserella - "Yeah. Hence coffee."
Bets - "You know I hated your father too. There was just something creepy about him, the way he looked at me ... I'm just going to say I'm not surprised your mom left."
Miserella - "I'm not surprised what happened just after."
Bets - "Yeah ... "
~ sips
Miserella - "I had a dream about him once. It was ... I don't know."
~ her dad at the nightclub - "I don't know."
~ her dad at the nightclub - "I don't know."
Miserella - "I don't know. But I hated him and now he's dead. And that's not even why I want to cry, I don't even know why."
Bets - "I know why."
Miserella - "Yeah ?"
Bets - "Relief. The inevitable. And now it's done."
Bets - "Relief. The inevitable. And now it's done."
Switchblade
~ Ten Years Ago ~
The 'Detective', though clearly not yet walks to house pulling a cart filled with Bibles ~
Detective - Looking up at the minor manor with a smile ... "A Bible in every bedroom ... " He looks at a folk art metal duck with frozen wind spinning wings. A curious smile before giving them a spin, then turns fast to the gate, realizing he was watched.
Young Miserella on a bicycle watches him from the gate with a smile ~
Detective - Showing the source of that salesman smile ... "Well hello there ! Do you live here ?"
Miserella - Still smiling back, "Sometimes !" Gets off her bicycle and leans it on the fence before walking directly through him, leaving him stuck in a thick viscous effigy of time, struggling to move in its jelly.
All slows down in
Detective - Looking up at the minor manor with a smile ... "A Bible in every bedroom ... " He looks at a folk art metal duck with frozen wind spinning wings. A curious smile before giving them a spin, then turns fast to the gate, realizing he was watched.
Young Miserella on a bicycle watches him from the gate with a smile ~
Detective - Showing the source of that salesman smile ... "Well hello there ! Do you live here ?"
Miserella - Still smiling back, "Sometimes !" Gets off her bicycle and leans it on the fence before walking directly through him, leaving him stuck in a thick viscous effigy of time, struggling to move in its jelly.
All slows down in
his motion while time moves into a blur, until the lady of the house arrives and he's pulled back to our world.
Mom (prior 'the prostitute) - Smiles startled, "Oh ! Hello ... um. Bible salesman. ... Really ?" Heads for the door, unlocking it.
Detective - "I've ... been stuck here. For a year. There was a girl ... she ... "
Mom - Suddenly serious, "Yeah. Look. I've got a guest coming ... you should go."
Detective - Analyzing ... "Hey can I have a glass of water ?"
...
Mom - "Sure. But I'm not lying. Pull anything and he will kill you." Looks at the top of the Bible pile ... "Though That one ... you know my daughter might actually like that big one on top."
Detective - "Ah. Yes ... 'The New Family Bible' ... very popular. Beveled cover and God's own gold on the trim ... wait, daughter ?"
Mom - "Yeah. Think you may already have met her. Still wanna make that sale ?"
...
Detective - "Kinda !"
Mom - "That's the spirit. Come on in ! Though please leave the rest of the cart, it'll be fine."
He follows with apprehension, looking back to the cart and the sky ... then in the greet waiting until the cup of water. A sip as he watches her walk for the door just before the knock. Switchblade at the door, but as a normal man. Two smiles and a kiss in the frame.
Man - Looks at the salesman, "Huh. Didn't think your kind still existed." Takes the book from his frozen hands, looks at her. "You're right, she's gonna love it." A sideways smile at the salesman, "How much ?"
Detective - "Free for some answers. Something very strange just happened to me."
Man - A shared look of concern with the mom, "Yeah ? How bout a bill instead of that."
Detective - "Fair."
The door opens as the money changes hands ... two smiles trying too hard before the mom walks over with a hug.
Miserella - "You again."
The two men look at each other uncertain which she means, she walks for the stairs.
Detective - To the Mom, "No I mean there's something really wrong here."
Man - After Miserella, "Look. Honey ... "
Miserella - "Don't call me that."
Mom - "Ohhh ... Les Mis ...
Miserella - "Stop."
And the man begins crumbling in pain, legs rotting from beneath him, arms scattering their flesh as all else returns to that viscous hell, the Detective banging on the banister becoming a twisted thing, screaming muffled through the fog like water, "Demon from Hell. Demon from Hell ... DEMON From HELL !"
Miserella - Now holding the Bible, "You're right." Looks at the detective, "I just fucking love it." Turns back up the stairs.
Mom (prior 'the prostitute) - Smiles startled, "Oh ! Hello ... um. Bible salesman. ... Really ?" Heads for the door, unlocking it.
Detective - "I've ... been stuck here. For a year. There was a girl ... she ... "
Mom - Suddenly serious, "Yeah. Look. I've got a guest coming ... you should go."
Detective - Analyzing ... "Hey can I have a glass of water ?"
...
Mom - "Sure. But I'm not lying. Pull anything and he will kill you." Looks at the top of the Bible pile ... "Though That one ... you know my daughter might actually like that big one on top."
Detective - "Ah. Yes ... 'The New Family Bible' ... very popular. Beveled cover and God's own gold on the trim ... wait, daughter ?"
Mom - "Yeah. Think you may already have met her. Still wanna make that sale ?"
...
Detective - "Kinda !"
Mom - "That's the spirit. Come on in ! Though please leave the rest of the cart, it'll be fine."
He follows with apprehension, looking back to the cart and the sky ... then in the greet waiting until the cup of water. A sip as he watches her walk for the door just before the knock. Switchblade at the door, but as a normal man. Two smiles and a kiss in the frame.
Man - Looks at the salesman, "Huh. Didn't think your kind still existed." Takes the book from his frozen hands, looks at her. "You're right, she's gonna love it." A sideways smile at the salesman, "How much ?"
Detective - "Free for some answers. Something very strange just happened to me."
Man - A shared look of concern with the mom, "Yeah ? How bout a bill instead of that."
Detective - "Fair."
The door opens as the money changes hands ... two smiles trying too hard before the mom walks over with a hug.
Miserella - "You again."
The two men look at each other uncertain which she means, she walks for the stairs.
Detective - To the Mom, "No I mean there's something really wrong here."
Man - After Miserella, "Look. Honey ... "
Miserella - "Don't call me that."
Mom - "Ohhh ... Les Mis ...
Miserella - "Stop."
And the man begins crumbling in pain, legs rotting from beneath him, arms scattering their flesh as all else returns to that viscous hell, the Detective banging on the banister becoming a twisted thing, screaming muffled through the fog like water, "Demon from Hell. Demon from Hell ... DEMON From HELL !"
Miserella - Now holding the Bible, "You're right." Looks at the detective, "I just fucking love it." Turns back up the stairs.
('The Last Waltz' by Fangbanger)
~ Switchblade ~
Miserella's mom sits in the asylum, staring at the others in their varied madness, an orderly whispers in her ear, she looks back shocked.
Orderly - "Yes, you'll be under your husband's care."
Mom - "Oh God."
She nervously exits the asylum and sees an old and clean Cadillac waiting, the Detective leaning on it with a smoke.
Mom - "You ?"
Detective - "Yeah." A drag before tossing to the dry grass. "There was no other way."
Mom - "Miserella ?"
Detective - "We'll get to her. You're gonna get it all back."
Mom - "I don't want it all. I just want my daughter whole again."
Detective - "That's the plan. But first. We've got to kill the beast."
Mom - "But he ... "
Detective - "He's not what he used to be. I'm sorry."
Mom - Looks the car over ... "No. I don't believe that you are." Gets in.
Orderly - "Yes, you'll be under your husband's care."
Mom - "Oh God."
She nervously exits the asylum and sees an old and clean Cadillac waiting, the Detective leaning on it with a smoke.
Mom - "You ?"
Detective - "Yeah." A drag before tossing to the dry grass. "There was no other way."
Mom - "Miserella ?"
Detective - "We'll get to her. You're gonna get it all back."
Mom - "I don't want it all. I just want my daughter whole again."
Detective - "That's the plan. But first. We've got to kill the beast."
Mom - "But he ... "
Detective - "He's not what he used to be. I'm sorry."
Mom - Looks the car over ... "No. I don't believe that you are." Gets in.
~ Now ~
('I Yam what I Yam' by Robin Williams)
In an abandoned manor room Switchblade watches Popeye sing on his little TV intently with an entertained smile, "Yuh."
~ The Cadillac drives the way to the manor, followed by three SWAT vans, a limousine following them surrounded by police cars and cycles, then the National Guard and last some curious kids on their bicycles.
He dances with the song, the television in hand as though a partner.
~ The entourage turns for the driveway, the Guard stopping at the gate and warding the kids off before setting up their camp.
A spin, "Ha." He roars with the song, "I YAM WHAT I YAM !"
Miserella pulls out an earbud and looks around to see if she heard something ... then back in and playing on the phone.
~ The kids watch the Guard set up from a tree a tree across the street, in the bathroom mirror Miserella dresses as an ice cream monster for stand at the kiddie park. She looks at the giant stuffed ice cream bar, not seeing the detective in the mirror, picks it up and heads for the door.
Switchblade - Stops in the hall in front the door, the many dogs passing and tearing. He smiles as the blades ratchet ... "Wait here, beloved beast. It's your enemies whose heats upon, we wish to feast." He continues on with the last of the dogs. Sounding again like the man he once was, "And feast we shall."
The Bible drops dusty from from the arm of his cloak with mechanical sounds as though the machine he's become was releasing it. She stares at it frozen as he walks away.
~ The Cadillac drives the way to the manor, followed by three SWAT vans, a limousine following them surrounded by police cars and cycles, then the National Guard and last some curious kids on their bicycles.
He dances with the song, the television in hand as though a partner.
~ The entourage turns for the driveway, the Guard stopping at the gate and warding the kids off before setting up their camp.
A spin, "Ha." He roars with the song, "I YAM WHAT I YAM !"
Miserella pulls out an earbud and looks around to see if she heard something ... then back in and playing on the phone.
~ The kids watch the Guard set up from a tree a tree across the street, in the bathroom mirror Miserella dresses as an ice cream monster for stand at the kiddie park. She looks at the giant stuffed ice cream bar, not seeing the detective in the mirror, picks it up and heads for the door.
Switchblade - Stops in the hall in front the door, the many dogs passing and tearing. He smiles as the blades ratchet ... "Wait here, beloved beast. It's your enemies whose heats upon, we wish to feast." He continues on with the last of the dogs. Sounding again like the man he once was, "And feast we shall."
The Bible drops dusty from from the arm of his cloak with mechanical sounds as though the machine he's become was releasing it. She stares at it frozen as he walks away.
~ five
('Hallowed be thy Enemy' by Public Enemy + Iron Maiden)
He tears of the already shredded cloak, blades switching out from all over the body, mechanisms spawning and forcing out random objects, stuffed animals, old toys for a girl, yet for everything dropped he seems to grow larger in his march.
~ Outside the detective turns his head as though something were detected throws down his smoke and starts walking the long drive for the manor. The soldiers and police behind caught off guard by his lack of care for their presence shortly turn to follow, prepping their weapons on the way.
Switchblade builds to a run with a snarled expression.
~ The detective does the same while the small army behind sets up their distant front.
Miserella picks up the Bible and opens it. Four leaf cloves collected and pressed, pictures of her and him with her mom. Her mind puts it together, she turns the other way from the hall.
Switchblade's arms enumerated skittering wall and ceiling forward for the door. An appendage scoops up a dog to give it love along the way before returning it to the masse. The last object drops, a book of nursery rhymes open to a photograph of him reading it to her.
She hears her own voice, "Can we have a puppy ? Daddy won't let us there."
Switchblade's voice - "Of course we can."
The door explodes from the inside as he charges through, the dogs sweeping out fast in all directions. The detective continues to charge for him, Switchblade charging still, the backup takes very defensive positions.
They open fire, the dogs are nimble, Switchblade swings but the detective isn't there. Looking back, he's at the manor's blown door lighting a smoke before turning in to. Switch's flesh then scattered by bullets, he turns to the attackers.
All the dogs stop looking to him.
Switchblade - "Eat him."
They turn for the manor as now all fire is on him. He looks to the limo and smiles ... as he rhymes the bullets all seem to cyclone in time into the swinging of his blades, directs behind him.
"I'm not afraid of the orange fiddle rhyme.
I'll give you three or four in just a little time.
Hide and shut the door, ingest a little wine.
Have a little more, in gin it tastes just fine.
! Because !
I'm not afraid of the orange fiddle rhyme.
I am the poet who loves the letter X.
That xylophone
Was a pile of old bone
But the dancers loved it's hex.
So why do we condone
All the broken down tones
Of the orange fiddle sex?
With the high low moans,
In erogenous zones
And foreign jest effects ?
! Because !
Everybody loves the orange fiddle rhyme ...
I'll give you four in ... "
! Just a little time !"
Detective - Standing behind him, "Gotcha."
He slashes a strap holding an appendage on with his razor. As Switchblade turns he's always behind, another strap here and another one there, until he begins to stumble with blades dangling uselessly. He turns for the manor door, the little monster staring.
Captain - "! Hold Fire !" ... a look for the strangeness of the outfit.
Parts falling off of his body he stumbles up the manor steps on burned away stumps to the door, nearly falling on her as she falls backward.
Miserella - "I ... I thought I imagined you."
Switchblade - Smiles, "You did."
The detective lands slicing on his back, he pulls back his head and slits the throat.
Miserella - Black oil covering her from the wounds, "Then ... the dream. My ... father."
Switchblade - Weakening but unaffected in tone, "I'm so sorry."
The detective hacks as a madman ... "Die demon DIE ! Leave this poor girl alone.
Miserella - "No. I want you to live."
Switchblade - Smiles again with love, "As you wish."
She remembers in tears watching movies with him and her mom, "Finish it."
('Live for Love' by Prince)
The dogs leap over knocking the detective off his back, his arms and
legs reforming as a man's again, all things around slowing for the
detective as it was ten years ago, now experienced by the police as
well, panicked fire useless against the unaffected dogs.
Flesh grows, wide eyed children watch from the neighboring trees as Switchblade's body turns slowly in the light as his flesh and mind returns (naked) ~
Flesh grows, wide eyed children watch from the neighboring trees as Switchblade's body turns slowly in the light as his flesh and mind returns (naked) ~
('Fire and Brimstone' by Death Valley Girls)
Detective - Now himself lost in staring ... "no ... ! NO !" He strains to release himself from the thick field, until he does once again as before.
Switchblade - Swings a punch and reaches with the hand behind him, catching the detective by the throat, "You just think you're so damn clever, don't you." He spins the detective into nearly as a hug from behind, chin held firm.
Looks at the limo across the field of throat ravaged police, dogs still chewing. "Almost done." Further to the gate beyond where Miserella's mother stands. An embittered look, a thumb down.
He cracks the neck and keeps on pulling until the head's torn off.
He cracks the neck and keeps on pulling until the head's torn off.
Picks up a blade fallen off and examines it. Inside the limo the last man harasses the driver to depart faster. A blade through the windshield cuts the driver in two.
Switchblade - As he walks naked and complete for the car, looking over the screams and carnage in passing, "Ascending never ending ... toil and trouble but that cauldron never bubbled so it's all been leading to you.
"Descending and pretending ... oil and rubble with your pauldron clever doubled, a ball of sin and now you're pleading anew !
"Changed man ... man with a plan, the internet stans for a clue.
"Arranged and ... fans in the hand, your splinted wet clan in the dew.
"Spending ever bending, ascending and descending how ... low can you go ? How far can you throw ? Your soul, is it so, just pull and let it go, bestow ... you know ... I know."
Metal through the car's window, he pulls the man through and looks him close in the eye smiling. "Where River Styx flows." Miserella's mom walks up behind staring at the man with a winter's cold.
The sound of a blade through flesh, the eyes go wide and he drops.
They look at each other in tears before a long awaited kiss, Miserella running to through the abattoir of a yard still wearing her monster costume. Straight to credits as they join in the field from a helicopter view.
Switchblade - As he walks naked and complete for the car, looking over the screams and carnage in passing, "Ascending never ending ... toil and trouble but that cauldron never bubbled so it's all been leading to you.
"Descending and pretending ... oil and rubble with your pauldron clever doubled, a ball of sin and now you're pleading anew !
"Changed man ... man with a plan, the internet stans for a clue.
"Arranged and ... fans in the hand, your splinted wet clan in the dew.
"Spending ever bending, ascending and descending how ... low can you go ? How far can you throw ? Your soul, is it so, just pull and let it go, bestow ... you know ... I know."
Metal through the car's window, he pulls the man through and looks him close in the eye smiling. "Where River Styx flows." Miserella's mom walks up behind staring at the man with a winter's cold.
The sound of a blade through flesh, the eyes go wide and he drops.
They look at each other in tears before a long awaited kiss, Miserella running to through the abattoir of a yard still wearing her monster costume. Straight to credits as they join in the field from a helicopter view.
Credits et al ~
~ For K8 Panik and Alex Deville ~
('Who Made Who' by AC-DC)
(credits over their family fucking moment from Hell)
(credits over their family fucking moment from Hell)
Miserella - Sitting in the manor's exploded entryway like a patio, "That's where I got the money. The city got big time duped and wanted to pay out quietly damage and the carnage and what not."
Bets - "Oh ! ... Cool."
Bets - "Oh ! ... Cool."
('Don't Cry' by Fangbanger)
(more credits)
Bets - "Have you decided what you're gonna study ?"
Miserella - Looking into her tea, "Education."
A look ...
_____
A bowling ball bag slams on the chief's desk with about fifteen pounds in it.
Chief - "Well it's about goddamn time."
Miserella's mom - Cold as ice, "Yeah. My fee's for a head."
Chief - Leans back and reaches for the money drawer, "Gladly. One of the worst we've see." Looks up from the counting, "Oh ! Almost forgot. Interpol's waiting for you at your shitty little fucked up mansion."
_____
Bets - "Party motel."
~ Mom (voiced over) - "Swell."
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